how, how did i lose my way?

All the words, running through my head. All the images, flashing through my head. I feel deliriously overwhelmed, hopelessly gone. Sometimes I'll feel so surreal, so unreal, don't know who I am, don't know where I am, don't know all the have-beens. Was I ever there? Or like they said, everything becomes a figment of your imagination with time. What's real, is what you cannot see.

It's so hard to remember sometimes, everything that you once believed in. I forget what I want to remember, and remember what I want to forget. I'm just such a joke afterall, useless, and everything I think I am not. Weak in the bones, weak in the head, weak in the soul. I don't know. I don't know.

It's like, I never lived at all.

I can hear the silence screaming to me. It is so fucking loud, I wish it would stop. But I can't find the sound in my throat.