How, do I keep this wall up, with the strength that is failing me each day.
How, do I keep telling myself I don’t care, just to give me enough reason to walk on each day.
How, do I pretend not to see, not to hear, not to think, not to feel.
And when the tears get mingled with the laughs and screams and smiles, I really don’t know what’s real anymore.
I know it when I feel the wrenching inside. I know it when the sides of my mouth turn down. I know it when everything inside starts to jumble up. I know it when I am going to lose control. I know it when all I want is to scream for help. Over and over again.
When can I rest.
God, won’t you take me away, if you can’t make it end.
.jpg)